There's nothing like finding that groove because when I do, I tap into this self-confidence that is almost impossible for me to find otherwise. When I'm in that mood, it's easier to self-examine and figure out problems because my mind is totally open. Today, I came to this realization that I've been afraid a lot these days: of the dentist, of Owen's sleep never getting sorted out, of Owen getting another cold and thus another ear infection, of Zoe waking up puking again, of my really good friends moving away, of being far away from family and missing out on stuff, of not making the most of my time with Nathan and the kids, of failing to handle this challenging age Zoe is at the "right" way, of not getting enough sleep, of not eating right, of not succeeding at my new garden plot, of tornadoes and crazy weather, of the death of bin Laden meaning the start of an increase in intensity of violence against our country, of the kids getting bigger faster than my brain can fathom....and, I don't even consider myself a fearful person. I just think that for some reason I've been letting these things get the best of me and have had a harder time not allowing these fears to take up more space in my brain than the positive stuff. Maybe it's because I'm tired, or maybe it's just a natural thing for someone my age and knowing I am done having kids...kind of the end of a huge, long chapter of my life...whatever the reason, though I realized this morning on my run that one of the reasons it felt so good to run hard again was that I needed to jog my brain out of that funk and remind myself that even though I don't believe I have to deny these fears, I can overpower them with my strength of spirit.
To continue on with this mood, Nathan and I had a great day with the kids. We loaded them into our new bike trailer and headed to the annual Boulder Creek Festival. Such a beautiful day!
|I know, I know..the baby doesn't have a helmet...according to the Denver police, it's actually safer for babies this age to go without one. If you have research proving the opposite though, please share!|
|Signing up for the duck race! You don't actually get to set the duck off on the race, but you can go watch them set thousands of them down the creek.|
|Yay! Last year she needed Daddy to ride this with her, but this year she told him to "STAY HERE."|
|Zoe, Tristan and Sophie setting up shop|
|Her finished product...it makes me laugh that she covered their eyes up|